Hi Everyone,

Today I am reviewing Getting Real About Growing Up by Amrita Hobbs. This is a book that I found invaluable as a parent. It gave me some solid, no nonsense resources and advice about the adolescent years and encouraged me to enter this time with the view of my child as a whole person, not defined by behaviours and reactions, but with a much deeper sense of who she is and how she wishes to be.

The language is clear and non-patronising, and deals with issues such as relationships, pregnancy, depression, abuse, homosexuality, social isolation and physical changes. It is written in a calm and factual way which dispels myths and empowers the reader, without imparting any particular moral prerogative.

Hobbs has written a realistic, deeply spiritual book about subjects that are all too often delegated either to the 'too hard' basket or treated as purely physical manifestations of growing up. This is no doubt due in large measure to the fact that she has facilitated many parent child groups over the years. Hobbs gently encourages the reader to question his/her own beliefs and assumptions and shares numerous poems, stories and input from teenagers who have been there before.

I found that sharing Getting Real About Growing Up allowed my teenager and I to discuss social issues in a relaxed and informed way we may not have done otherwise.

This is definately a book I will be sharing with all of my children as they reach adolescence and recommend it to anyone wanting a relevant, well-informed resource dealing with this often sensitive time.

Talk Soon, Cynthia x

Doulas Supporting Teens

Hi Everyone,

I have been reading about a not-for-profit organisation called Doulas Supporting Teens, and I am really excited by the results they are achieving. By offering the free support of doulas to girls who become pregnant in their teens, rates of peaceful births are slowly on the rise in this demographic.

Here is a direct quote from their web-site:

Founded in 2003, Doulas Supporting Teens was created as a grassroots effort to help fill the need pregnant and parenting teens in Oregon have for prenatal education, continuous labor support, in-home early postpartum care and continued support throughout the first year of parenting. Since 2003, Doulas Supporting Teens (DST) has provided services for over 200 pregnant and parenting teens and their families, and helped teen parents negotiate critical choices during pregnancy, birth, and early parenthood.

Doulas Supporting Teens' mission is to support and educate pregnant and parenting teens to bring healthy babies into healthy families to build healthy communities......

The purpose of DST is to increase awareness of, access to, and quality of education and health care for women age 18 and under and their infants. Doulas Supporting Teens:

• Connects DST doulas (labor support professionals) with pregnant teens, providing evidence based information, as well as emotional and physical support during pregnancy, labor and postpartum.
• Offers free teen-focused childbirth education classes, parenting support groups, social events, and referrals to community resources.

What a wonderful idea, and so simple. I remember as a teenager being generally unsure about the process of labour and childbirth. It seemed something alien and painful, and dramatic birth scenes in movies and on tv didn't really give me any information about the empowering calmness you can invoke during childbirth by going within! Offering grounded, caring support and information in addition to a direct experience of community to young mothers is an absolute gift.

Australian government programmes meet some of these criteria, but current funding isn't allowing for this level of individualised support although, several successful community and church based programmes are running to meet the challenge of social isolation and prejudice experienced by many teen parents.

Inspired by reading about the information on the DST site and the Midwifery Today article about the organisation, I am hopeful of one day finding a similar programme funded within the framework of the Health Department.
I can but dream..........

Talk Soon, Cynthia

Beautiful Breastfeeding

Another celebration of beautiful motherhood. Just as beautiful as those mums we see breastfeeding everyday on cafe booths, buses and park benches complete with milkstained shoulder and unbrushed hair after a night pacing the floorboards with baby :)

There is power that comes to women when they give birth. They don't ask for it, it simply invades them. Accumulates like clouds on the horizon and passes through, carrying the child with it.

Sheryl Feldman

A midwife has posted an inspiring video of a beautiful baby emerging in the caul, in a posterior position and managing beautifully on her own just as nature intended. Here's the u-tube link ...

Talk Soon, Cynthia x

Hi Everyone,

Ever since I saw this picture, I've been thinking about fashion designers, manufacturers and retailers and how they influence how we dress, eat, drink and indeed how long we breastfeed our infants....

A few years ago the picture of a standing child (toddler) breastfeeding would have been shocking, confronting and even indecent...still is to many.

There is copious medical evidence to substantiate the value of prolonged feeding to the health of our infants, and still mothers are judged by some for doing what they deem best for their child.

I personally recall sitting at a cafe discreetly feeding my eighteen month old child and having a middle aged man stare at me and pointedly move his chair to face his back to me.

Now, I'm pretty confident as a mother and within myself but I felt that touch of embarrassment, shame and anger creeping in at his obvious ignorance and intended rudeness. Fortunately I was with someone who reaffirmed with me my rights around these issues...what a blessing a good strong friend is :)

With this in mind, it's interesting to me that one retailer in a trendy European maternity boutique (above pic) has chosen to make this statement in a store window and it's flying around the internet to great acclaim. It would seem that there is a shift toward public acceptance of breastfeeding.

Maybe now that it's becoming fashionable to breastfeed, this will become the accepted norm, and our society will actively encourage mothers to nourish their children in this way, for as long as they wish.

We can but hope....

Talk Soon, Cynthia x

The Natural Child - Book Review

Hi Everyone

The Natural Child is a gorgeous book which I enjoyed from cover to cover. It's written by parenting counsellor and director of The Natural Child Project, Jan Hunt. It is full of compassion, ideas and gentle promptings about how we can all improve the quality of life for the children around us.

The Natural Child is divided into sections dealing with issues such as parenting with empathy and trust, living with a baby, siblings adjusting to baby, living with children, guiding children, helping children learn and advocating for children.

The section on parenting infants recommends Dr Elliot Barker's steps for healthy children. Summarised as a positive birthing experience, extended breastfeeding, minimal separations and consistency of caregivers, and careful spacing of children. Of course this is an ideal not always possible to achieve, but definitely worth thinking about as a theory.

I particularly like that Hunt has not left off caring for our children's emotional needs once they pass infancy. Children remain highly sensitive and impressionable beings well into childhood and attachment parenting is advocated throughout this book not as over protection or neurosis but as a necessary connection to maintain with your child to ensure independence in thought and emotional well being through to the teen and adult years.

Hunt shares her experiences as a homeschooling parent, and offers suggestions about how to best serve the learning needs of children, including those with a learning disability.

In The Natural Child, Hunt advocates caring for all children within our community rather than just our immediate family. She believes that children are the responsibility of the society they live in and that if they are suffering through dysfunction, then we as a community are all accountable. She offers practical suggestions for improving the experience of the parents and children around us, and shares that even if we see no immediate effect from our actions

the sheer act of standing up for the child can have a
significant impact on the child herself

Definitely something to consider.

I will finish with the concluding paragraph because I believe it sums up the book better than I ever could...

When we believe in our child fully, we trust that they are doing the very best they can at every moment, given their age, past experience and present circumstances.......Having someone dependably "on their side" is absolutely critical if a child is to grow into adulthood with a generous capacity for love and trust.

If we aren't on their side, who will be?

Talk Soon, Cynthia x

Hi Everyone,

There is a new film called One World Birth that's just been released, and I was really impressed by the first installment. You can access it by following this link and signing up.

Cynthia x